At 26, I am sure I do not want children. I am so sure that today, I am getting my tubes tied! In a simple, 45 minute procedure I will do away with a future of worrying about reproductive health and my clock ticking. It is so routine that I will be back in my bed this evening with the assistance of a friend and back on my feet tomorrow afternoon. Easy peasy. Let's all get one!
I have been considering having my tubes tied as a more permanent form of contraception for many years. However, if you are under the age of thirty and have not had children, it is highly unlikely a doctor will agree to such a procedure. It is just too common for us women to change our minds apparently. As my doctor explained to me, up to 30% of women who have their tubes tied will have it reversed and only 30% of those women will be able to conceive afterwards. He told me he didn't want to live with the guilt of taking away a woman's ability to give birth, especially a young, unmarried and childless woman.
I had an IUD put in at 21 the first time I asked a doctor about more permanent contraceptive methods. She said I was too young to make those kinds of decisions. I agreed that I could think on it more. Five years later I was at the end of a 13 month waiting list and sitting in a room filled with expecting mothers and young children plotting out my arguments. In an effort to convince this strange man of my assuredness, I built my case with these points:
- Human Overpopulation- Number one reason for me not to have children is because the world just has to many bodies on it right now. We have surpassed the carrying capacity of our planet by not being responsible breeders. Too many people use up too many resources and take up too much space from other species. The easiest solution is, have less children immediately. Fortunately, the birth rate has been declining as the developing world is beginning to have smaller families but the rise in population is forecast to increase for the next 35 years or so. Right now what you can do it decide not to have any more mouths to feed.
- I have never seen myself as a mother. I know the urge to be a mother usually develops over time. It is just something I do not see for me.
- My body, my choice.
- No more pill! I started on the pill at 12!!! I will not longer need to rely on hormones and pharmaceutical companies foe my reproductive health and responsibilities.
- Insurance- Literally the main reason I (and many young women) ever worry about insurance was to pay for the pill.
- Chemical Free, I can live a life less chemically altered than taking hormonal contraceptives for the majority of it.
- Environment, so not only will I be using less chemicals, I will also be reducing the amount of run-off or sewage of contraceptives that get into our water stream and have effected hormone levels in men and children- See article
- Adoption- There are so many children in the world who need a home that it just seems selfish of me to have my own children. My doctor asked me what would happen if I met someone whowanted children and I explained that my ideal person would also be thrilled with adoption if we decided to take on children together. Until then I am free to wander, me by my unattached self.
- I have more interest in my chicken babies than real ones.
- No more explaining. I will be able to shut down anyone who asks me if or when I'm having kids, again. "I just can't". I really am just saving myself from a lifetime of reproductive questioning and bullying by the mainstream who attempt to devalue me as a woman for my choices.
I love babies, they are beautiful and necessary to perpetuate our existence. We just have so many, too many and my little drop in the bucket is to not contributing to that. I worry my friends and family with children will judge me as rejecting them and their lifestyles. Please do not. I think your little dears are just precious. My choice does not mean I do not respect yours, but it it my choice. The message for me is, you have one!
Have a lovely day,
Melanie
No comments:
Post a Comment